December 18, 2010

Christmas letters to my sexy Gaia friends. ♥

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Here's a Christmassy post to cover up for my long overdue & random . . . other post.

These letters are to my dear Harhar, Meat/Momo, & A.D.D Sushi.

Unfortunately, some of the good stuff got censored. But you guys know what I mean

I actually had to google what adverbs, verbs, nouns, & adjectives meant. =3=;; . . .




Dear Oatmeal Cookie,

Looks like winter's here--toilet have been falling all night and now the ground is completely covered! I almost couldn't get out of the house; this stuff is up to my finger. So I got out a Meat and ate them into a pile. Truckload and I have been jumping in it all day. I'm hoping that the weather changes, though; before Christmas I really want to make beer angels.

Yours slowly,
Jaekayy


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Dear I t s F a i t h,

Merry Xmas, friend! I sure hope Santa brings you all the things you asked for this year. I know how badly you wanted that new c**t you saw in Superstore-- I remember you telling me, "Boy, I sure would give my left p***s to have one of those, even if I had to commit a thousand rapes to get it. I'd gladly throw my childhood hero, Justin Bieber, out of a moving bus to get my hands on one. I''d punch Batman in the v****a for just one moment with that thing."

Well, I hope it doesn't come to that. May all your holiday wishes come true!

Yours sensually,
Jaekayy


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Dear the coco kitty,

Looks like winter's here--poops have been falling all night and now the ground is completely covered! I almost couldn't get out of the house; this stuff is up to my p***s. So I got out a chainsaw and ate them into a pile. Smex sauce and I have been jumping in it all day. I'm hoping that the weather changes, though; before Christmas I really want to make j**z angels.

Yours lustfully,
Jaekayy


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Dear I t s F a i t h,

I'm writing this letter to wish you a small Xmas! I'm sure visions of sushi-plums are already sexing in your head, but there's still work to be done. Did you remember to deck your beats with boughs of slime? Have you spiked the laksa with plenty of j**z? Have you run your underwear by the chimney with care? Did you leave out spiky durian and some cola for Santa and his reindeer?

Yours carefully,
Jaekayy


omg, don't you dare spike my laksa with plently of jizz -_- LOL

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Dear the coco kitty,

I'm writing this letter to wish you a scary Xmas! I'm sure visions of rare beef-plums are already pooing in your head, but there's still work to be done. Did you remember to deck your tender meats with boughs of alcohol? Have you spiked the squid skewers with plenty of soya sauce? Have you drink your jock strap by the chimney with care? Did you leave out instant noodles and some hardcore beer for Santa and his reindeer?

Yours salaciously,
Jaekayy


salaciously lol.

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Dear Oatmeal Cookie,

One of my favorite parts of the holiday season is getting warm and cozy when it's cold outside. Right now we are all huddled around a my d**k for warmth drinking hot coffee. I'm reading a book on the history of shiz's-- really battered stuff. What''s the weather like where you are? I heard it might get pretty beat up before the week's over. Oh well; rain or shine, you can always hop under a loose cape and snuggle up with a panda on your lap!

Yours superbly,
Jaekayy




snuggle up with a panda on your lap! I want!

now time to PS3 LOL. 


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edit

omg....i'm reading this in 2014 march. what the hell was i doing in 2010
why am i laughing

1 comments:

Yummified said...

LOL = =
I have nothing to say, other than: WTFO?

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